Monday, October 10, 2011

Just for the record...

My husband's grandma, who lives in Tucson, celebrated her 90th birthday this week. Grandma is a sweet old lady, and a dedicated Christian. She is still sharp as a tack, and really in great physical shape considering her age. I've been told that when she was younger, she would eat a chocolate cake for lunch every day, so that's my strategy now.

While we were at Grandma's party, there were of course lots of other relatives there. Some of them I had never met, so this was a wonderful opportunity to meet those more distant relatives. One particular relative had two subjects of conversation with me the whole time: talking about all the toys they own, or want to own, and asking me when I was going to stop having kids. The latter definitely took up the greater part of their interactions with me.

For the record: Yes, we will "just keep having kids". You don't have to pay for them, and never will, so why do you care? Just get over it. No, my husband never told you he wanted to stop after six - he'd hardly preach against birth control if he felt that way. And - why is your only concern about the possibility of my husband's untimely demise whether or not he has enough life insurance to support me and the kids? Wouldn't you rather fear the loss of him as a person, not just the breadwinner? No, I will never name any of my children after you, since you can't even remember all the names of the kids we have now. No, giving me life advice while downing tumbler after tumbler of Coke and rum is probably not going to add to your credibility. When I want to end up like you in life, I will start asking you for your opinion on these issues. No, I don't want to get together with you again any time soon if you keep talking like this about my children right in front of them. They do have ears, you know, and even feelings. They are not things, they are people. Yes, we think children are God's greatest blessing in this life. Yes, if we wanted to, we could go out and buy all sorts of vehicles and houses and toys on credit, but we are smart enough not to.

Thank you all for listening. I feel better now that I have this off my chest. You know, because it kept me up all night that a washed-up old drunk whose only pursuit in life is money and toys thinks I should stop having kids.

Our blessings


  1. "No, I will never name any of my children after you, since you can't even remember all the names of the kids we have now."

    That's very rude of a relative. Considering I only know your family from pictures on your blog, and I could name all 6 cute ones on every picture, this man seems horrible ...
    Plus, I think that when a person has 6 children, it seems obvious that she/he likes children, and may want to have more. It's so indelicate to ask if you are going to stop.

    (I don't want to seem insisting, but I'm very curious about what your family is reading, beside the Bible, of course. I love reading and it was a huge part of my childhood, so I wonder what their tastes are ! Thanks if you answer that question ! :D)

  2. Sibylle,

    I'm sorry I forgot to answer your question. The kids all love to read. They like non-fiction (i.e. books that teach about a certain subject), as well as fiction.

    Solomon loves learning about space, and really anything related to science. Isaac loves learning about animals, and history. We read about 30 non-fiction books per week as part of our homeschool curriculum.

    As far as fiction, one of the authors Solomon likes is Jules Verne. Both Solomon and Isaac love the "Hardy Boys". As a family, we have read out loud: the entire "Litte House" series, Heidi, Robinson Crusoe, the "Boxcar Children" books, and others like it.

  3. I read some books of Jules Vernes when I was a child myself :) Not exactly the kind of books I enjoy the most, however.

    That's nice :) I love science, Solomon is lucky to learn about it, because it's very important to be able to understand how things work. Space, too, is amazing, most children go through a space phase ^^"

    Reading out loud ! That's something we never really did, except story time in the evening (that lasted until I could read by myself, my sister is older than me and could already read her own books on her own). It must be very nice :) I loved Robinson Crusoe, I think I must have read it four or five times !

    Thanks for answering !

  4. Oh my goodness! I almost can't believe a person could be SO rude...but then we have relatives of our own, so I can!

    This post made me chuckle! ;)

  5. My Grandma just turned 91 on October 4th. She is fine shape physically but has alzheimers. though it doesn't seem to affect her much except the remembering.

  6. I completely understand.. there is such a relative with us too! Asked me one time I need to spend time working so that way when the children are not at home I will not be bored with no one to take care of ( guess she forgot about my husband, lol) Also told me that if I have more I won't be able to love the other's enough or give them enough attention. She doesn't realize that no matter how many kids you have, you still love each one 100%

  7. I always wonder about that, how people could say things like that IN FRONT of the children?! It blows my mind. How do keep from blowing up at people when they ask such personal questions and try to tell you how to live your life? Well I guess this post was a good So sorry you had to go through that again and without a doubt will have to keep having such unpleasant conversations for years to come.

  8. That is one rude relative, especially considering he had never met you before! But, you know, there is one in every family!!!

    I have a totally random question for you and am hoping you'll have a chance to answer. I know you make waffles a lot for your kids - do you use a standard waffle iron that uses teflon/non-stick coating? I've tried to rid my house of Teflon but am not sure what else to use for waffles?!?!? Not exactly earth-shattering, I know, but my kids want some waffles :-)

  9. I almost forgot to wish a happy birthday to the grandma ! She must have had a complete life, I hope it was a happy and joyful one.

    And, by the way, John's suit is adorable. Red is definitely my favourite colour and he's lovely wearing it ! :)

  10. It's funny, most of your commenters assumed the relative was a man, while I assumed she was a woman. That would be because when I get a rude comment about the size of our family, (we also have 6), it is always a woman. Men either just smile or say nothing, regardless of whether or not we know them.

    In any case, I applaud you! Nothing is more wonderful than having a child. Absolutely nothing. Watching the little line turning pink is such a wonderful feeling.

    in His peace,

  11. That was great! (Your post, not your relative...LOL!) It frustrates me to no end when people talk around children like they are not there. Totally uncalled for. Great post!! :)

  12. Ha! what a rude relative, I hope they read your blog. I think I probably would have told them off on the spot and told them to mind their own stinking business.

  13. First, let me get this out of my system: What rudeness and stupidity! I wouldn't ask such personal things from my own siblings such as your relative in-law asked of you! And in front of the children! How on earth he made the leap to suggest naming 'one of 'em' after him is beyond my understanding!

    It is lovely that your children have a great-grandmother and I hope she had a wonderful birthday. When my great-grandmother was alive my mother interviewed her on tape and it means so much to us when we watch it now. I highly recommend it!

    The children look adorable--I love Miriam's Mary Janes and the girls little ruffled socks. Cuteness is not in short supply amongst her great-grandchildren...I'm off to eat a piece of choco cake now...

    God bless you, Dad, and the six plus Great-Grandma,


  14. Your husband's grandmother is lovely.

    People who brag about what they have are just trying to make themselves feel better about who they are.

  15. You have some of the most beautiful children I have ever seen. They look just precious and you ARE blessed tremendously.

    I agree with the other anonymous who said people who brag like that are just trying to make themselves feel better about who they are.

    I have 4 children and I have more than anyone in my family. The most anyone else has is 3. I get asked all the time, "Don't you know what causes that ("that" being having a baby I assume) yet?" accompanied by a snotty laugh. I don't appreciate it. Yes, I'm not an idiot, I know "how" I get that way. I find that people ALWAYS have comments. Mostly my family has negative comments, I get nicer comments from complete strangers.

    But if God didn't want you to have each and every one of those children, He wouldn't have given them to you. They are on this Earth for a reason. Too bad for others that they can't see or appreciate the miracle every child is.


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